You have to be from Jersey to appreciate the irony of Seaside Heights disavowing any connection to the “Jersey Shore” program on MTV. I propose a TV game show in which the zipperheads on “Jersey Shore” compete against Seaside’s mayor and council members, who had nothing better to do with the public’s time and money than issue a statement against the program.
“The governing body wants it to be known that they did not solicit, promote or participate in the filming of this show,” the statement says, casting doubt on how much more the town fathers and mothers retained from elementary English classes than the show’s guidos and guidettes.
“The production company that filmed the show did obtain a shoot permit to film in Seaside Heights, but these permits must be issued as it is a first amendment right to film in public places.” (Caps missing on “First Amendment,” comma missing after “issued”.)
But here’s where the fun really starts: “Furthermore, the Borough does not condone any discriminatory remarks against Italian Americans, domestic violence or the promiscuous and otherwise bad behavior portrayed on the show.
“Most importantly, we hope that most people watching the show understand that it is television…. The people on the show are certainly not indicative of the majority of those who visit, and enjoy the Jersey shore and Seaside Heights every summer.” (No comma after “visit.”)
But then they come right back with:
“Of the episodes that have aired to date, we were happy to see that the shots of our town looked as spectacular as they really are, and that any time public bad behavior surfaced, it was dealt with quickly.”
OK, so maybe they ain’t so dumb.
But, wait. Hold on there:
“As always, Seaside Heights welcomes all visitors, which behave decently, to enjoy our wonderful town and beautiful beach.”
“WHICH behave decently”?
Oh, Miss Crabtree….
In the end, officials who preside over the armpit of the Jersey Shore want it known that they had no choice but to rubber-stamp MTV’s application as a matter of “routine.” No scripts, no rehearsal tapes, nothing but a check filled out in the proper amount.
None too happy to collect that permit fee, no one in the “wonderful” town bothered to see what MTV was up to. Once the furor erupted, however, members of the governing body were quick to stand up and show what they’re made of.
They should’ve tried some gel or implants or abs crunches first.