I’m standing over them asking, “What about an American Girl doll? What about that DS game you wanted?”
Does this woman look worried?
See, I’m one of those people who refuses to give in to the madness that is “Black Friday” and so I spend December decorating the house, writing Christmas cards, baking cookies with the kids and patting myself on the back for knowing what others seem to have forgetten -- that Christmas is about family and traditions, not about who gets their hands on the hot toy of the season.
Then around the 22nd I’m gripped with panic: I just know that the kids won’t be dazzled on Christmas morning! So I run around like a crazed lunatic trying to track down that elusive and highly coveted toy.
This year was going to be different. This year I was going to order my gifts online and avoid the trampling hordes. That way I could still spend my time baking cookies, watching DVR’d Christmas specials and patting myself on the back, knowing those dazzling gifts were on there way, and being shipped for free since I ordered so early.
Turns out I might have been better off sticking to my customary last-minute frenzy.
I think the early Christmas push got to me. Nowadays the rush seems to start the day after Halloween, with news reports on the toys that will surely be sold out before you can get your hands on them.
This is the point where someone might start waxing nostalgic about how Christmas was so much simpler when they were a kid. Not me.
My dad grew up during the Depression and to this day can’t stand to throw anything away. Broken toasters, old batteries, worn shoelaces. “Hey, that’s perfectly good! I can use that for something!”
One Christmas I wanted that game Zim Zam - the game where you hit the tennis ball that swings on a spiral pole. My dad got a pair of my mom’s old stockings, which of course he had stored somewhere, put a tennis ball in one of the legs, tied the other leg to the clothesline and that was it.
I could just hear my friends: “Hey, I know what we can do today! Let’s go to Eileen’s house and play ‘Old Control-Top Pantyhose Zim Zam.’”
Another Christmas I asked for Teddy Ruxpin, the talking teddy bear that was the hot toy of 1981. My dad said, “All that is is a bunch of stuffing with some eyes sewn on. You know how easy that would be to make?”
Remember 2XL? That little robot that asked you questions and his eyes would light up and sounds would go off when you chose the right answer? My dad was like “All that is is an 8-track tape recorder inside a bunch of plastic. We’ll buy you the tapes that go in it and you can use my tape player.”
Not the same.
Somehow, though, my mom always seemed to come through with something wonderful. No doubt because amidst everything else she had to do, she was running around like a crazed lunatic on Dec. 22nd.
Which brings me back to my list of things that matter this time of year, to which I will add going the extra mile for the people you love to make them feel special. And yeah, part of that is getting them a gift they’ll really love.
So on with the boots and out into the slush. Time to do some happy exchanging.
Eileen was a semi-finalist in Nick at Nite’s “Search for the Funniest Mom in America,” and made a name for herself with " My Pony's in the Garage," which premiered at the NY Fringe Festival. She is currently writing a memoir based on her solo show and has written several treatments and spec scripts for television. She likes Springsteen, cheap beer and good Italian bread. Did we mention she’s from Jersey?
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wendy
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... I love these columns! Eileen says, and so articulately writes what every mom is doing/thinking. Thanks for making me smile every week. |
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